Be Happy This Day You Avoided The Tuxedo

Dear Matthew, you’re my brother
I’m so sorry you’ve been smothered

In Iowa no less
In this horrid heat wave stress.

Not a very nice way
To spend your seventeenth birthday

I send my best wishes
And hugs and kisses

You realize of course this was not my doing
If it were I think you’d be suing

Now go celebrate you birthday
May many blessings come your way

Avoid Wendy’s chili or a bean burrito
And be happy that this day you avoided the tuxedo.