Attaining Wisdom

Here is some advice
It will keep you wise
And happy in this year
The wisdom starts here:

Make sure you poop once a day
For it’s a bad thing to delay
If you have to go today,
Why wait ‘til Saturday?

Be sure to eat lots of meat
Because meat is very neat
And it contains a lot of protein
To keep your muscles always bloating

And stay far away from cats
Because cats are always brats
And they make you sneeze
Because of your allergies

Vegetables you must avoid
Not because you’re paranoid
But because they are bad
Very very very bad

Now you are wise
At least in my eyes
So happy birthday to you
My brother of decades, two